pulling your disguise up
by AnotherPerson5
Summary: Leslie can change her face, but she's still the same person underneath. Shape-shifter au Allison Rafferty/Leslie Shay endgame with unrequited Leslie Shay/Gabriela Dawson.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: contains unrequited Gabriela Dawson/Leslie Shay with eventual Leslie Shay/Allison Rafferty. **

* * *

Gabriela was the first person who didn t see it as anything other than something Leslie could do that most people couldn t, like watching someone lick their elbow. When they were on call and the guys were hogging the television they d sit in the back of the truck and Leslie would grow a large nose and beady eyes or sing their praises while wearing the face of the inspector who had it in for their firehouse. She could only sustain the morph for a few minutes, but that was usually long enough for them to dissolve into laughter and ride the train of conversation to other topics while she became herself again.

Clarice was the only other person who knew Leslie for what she was and she'd seen it as a chance to be with her and everyone else at the same time. She could make love to anyone she wanted without having to close her eyes and she could ask Leslie to morph before saying all the things she couldn't to her real face. She'd shut the door and without turning around whisper, "Change" because even though Leslie knew what was coming she always did it. Even in the beginning, when things were good, Clairice was never accustomed to it in the same way as Gabriela.

"Can you be Casey for a second?"

It was half muscle control half muscle memory and it felt like every part of her face was being moved into place with tweezers, thin metal prods manipulating her skin and bone structure while she clenched her teeth and endured the silent torture so that could Gabriela could practice her 'I'm in love with you' speech to Matthew's face.

"I can't stop thinking about you. I'm your friend, but sometimes you don't look at me like I'm just your friend and I need to know if it's all in my head. Is it?"

Leslie was only human, she knew that Gabriela wasn't saying those things to her, but technically she was and technically Gabriela had told Leslie she was in love with her and it wasn't as if Leslie was looking into a mirror while Gabriela said those things and was able to separate reality from fantasy. The morph faded painlessly so she only knew her face had changed when Gabriela's face would change. The light would blink out of her eyes as Matthew became Leslie and as she fell deeper in love with him Leslie fell harder and harder for her.

Bushier eyebrows, bigger cheeks, red eyes no purple no yellow bright yellow and frizzy white hair.

"Nothing? Damn, you really are bummed."

Gabriela had passed her fire fighter's test with the highest marks and been approached by a lieutenant in Springfield. She hadn't been seriously considering the move until she told Matthew who had flat out stated he'd never consider leaving which lead to an argument about the fact that the firehouses in their district were notoriously sexist against female candidates.

Leslie rolled her eyes and pulled forward for another sit up. Gabriela's arm was wrapped around her legs to keep them in position, but she could've been across the room for all the miles away she looked to be.

"Morph?"

"Please."

She did, adopting Matthew's tone of voice when she growled, "I thought you were serious about us."

"I am, you're the one who acted like I was giving you an ultimatum. I don't even know if I want to move."

"Well how do you expect me to know what you want when you don't know what you want?"

"I want you, all I've ever wanted was a job that I love and someone to spend the rest of my life with."

"You have that now, here, just because the road's a little tougher doesn't mean we're not worth fighting for."

"All I want is to know you'd sacrifice the same things I would to make this work. I'd marry you today if-"

"You'd marry me?"

Gabriela's hold on her legs eased. "Are you asking me to marry you?"

"I love you."

"That's not an answer."

Leslie licked her (Matthew's) lips. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Marry me."

Gabriela kissed Matthew, but when her lips parted it was Leslie's tongue against hers as stubble faded and inches were lost between their noses. Because she was Gabriela she didn't pull away with revulsion, but laughed as if it were a prank, sitting down on the yoga mat and thanking Leslie for helping her put things in perspective. Matthew wanted to be with her, live with her, and make a life together but Gabriela wasn't always as blunt with her feelings. If she came down hard on the side of moving to Springfield he'd follow her, but he wasn't the type to commit to a 'maybe'.

"Thanks, girlfriend, you give good Casey."

Leslie ached everywhere, from the top of her head to the pits of her heart, but she nodded like the words weren't her own and it was all an act.


	2. Chapter 2

Gabriela watched Allison put her things into her old/new locker.

"Take care of my partner."

"I'll try, she's accident prone."

Leslie picked up the box of Gabriela's things and held it out. "You say tomato I say-"

"Spike. Through. The. Abdomen."

"Hey," Gabriela took the box and held it tight against her front, "take care of each other. I'll call you tomorrow, Shay."

She didn't call and Leslie would never admit that she kept her phone on its highest volume all day just in case she did. After the first of many shifts without Gabriela Leslie stared at her ceiling and listened to talk radio because she couldn't bring herself to get up and change the station. The next morning she was woken up to the deafening ringtone and got ready while listening to her friend give a blow by blow description of her first day as a candidate. Leslie felt more than a little embarrassed about worrying, Gabby Dawson didn't let things like morph kisses and separate jobs come between friendships. It was one of the reasons she loved her.

"Why don't you invite Allison to classic rock night?"

"I don't think _Rafferty _would come if I invited her. Severide maybe."

"Anybody that homophobic has got to be a little gay. You know I'm right."

"I don't want anyone like that batting for my team, thanks. There's enough self loathing going on over here as it is."

Gabriela's voice softened. "Go to a mirror and morph into me." Leslie rolled her eyes, but went into the bathroom and focused.

"Okay."

"Now say 'You are a smoking, life saving, badass who is going to turn every 'phobe in a ten mile radius into a Shay lover…literally, if you're drunk enough."

Gabriela's voice joined hers as she said it and Leslie could both hear and see her laugh before they started talking about decorations and playlists.

Classic rock night lined up with a football game which ensured that more than just the players were indulging in touchdown dances with a bonus air guitar contest during halftime. Allison showed up just in time to watch Otis slide on his knees with a bandanna around his forehead and promptly started to turn back around before one of the guys spotted her and promised that it would be worth the blackmail material alone to stick around. She swore to have a drink then made her way to Leslie who was already a few beers in, sitting on a stool with her forehead nearly touching Gabriela's.

"Am I interrupting?"

"Nah, shop talk, take my seat."

"Dawson…"

"Matt's on his way, we'll catch up later."

Leslie turned forward as Allison dropped into Gabriela's spot. Something had happened in between Rafferty leaving, Gabriela coming back and Gabriela leaving again, but Allison couldn't figure out how to word it. There wasn't a right way to ask a lesbian why she'd stopped flirting with her heterosexual work associate because it was a question that got became even more wrong when the heterosexual work associate was a closeted bisexual widow who couldn't stop sending mixed signals to the lesbian who appeared even more hung up on her heterosexual best friend (who was living with her best friend/roommate's best friend) than before she left.

Allison chose to go with, "Who sings this song?" instead.

Maybe it was the fact that once Matthew showed up he was attached to his girlfriend's face like a mask and maybe it was the fact that Allison had stories like reattaching someone's pinky at a keg party, either way Leslie didn't think twice when Allison asked her to join her outside for some air. Words were being said and their breath was materializing and mingling as they laughed and bumped shoulders when a kid who looked barely old enough to drive snatched Allison's purse and tugged, throwing punches in kicks in his attempt to separate the bag from its owner.

"Stop," Leslie gasped when she caught up to Allison who'd taken off after him to no avail. "Look at my face, is this his face?"

"Oh my god!" Her fingers dug into her hair as she stared at Leslie, one foot forward and one foot back as if she was debating whether to run.

"Take a picture, quick, take a picture before I fold." The alcohol was making it difficult for her to hang on to the mental image of the thief. "Allison!"

She dropped her phone, almost into a puddle, but she did it, triple tapping to compensate for the shock and not moving as Leslie became Leslie again.

"What are you?"

"I'm not a freak."

"I didn't say you were."

"Show Dawson the photo, tell her everything, she'll have her brother take care of it."

"Hey, wait a second."

Leslie didn't wait, sober until she was on the other side of her front door and her vision began to twist and darken.

Her tongue felt thick and fuzzy against her teeth and mouthwash only seemed to make it worse. On top of that she'd had enough to warrant a hangover, but not enough to blot out the memory of her white knighting that had resulted in morphing in front of Allison of all people. Because all terrible things came in threes Kelly made her a remedy shake before telling her that Matthew was proposing to Gabriela over a dinner to which they were invited.

"If you were a real friend you'd kill me now."

"Yeah, but you're the only person who would help me get rid of a body so it's kind of a lose-lose for me."

Leslie decided to deal with one problem at a time. She drank the shake, took something for her various pains, then asked Allison to take a walk. The kid was a druggie and thanks to the photo he was behind bars after getting picked up by a beat cop. Allison was out a hundred dollars and would need to replace some credit cards and badges, but otherwise she was okay.

"How about you?"

Leslie decided to get it out of the way early and pulled up leg of her pants. "I can make the bruise go away for about an hour, it's not too bad."

"Fuck, I thought I dreamt it. I had the photos, but I still couldn't believe it."

"I try not to brag."

"I won't tell anyone. Your business is your business." Leslie nodded, pulled her cap down a little snugger over her ears. "Does it hurt?"

"Only when I put pressure on it."

"No, like changing your face, does it hurt?"

No one had ever bothered to ask her, not even her parents who were the most accepting of it next to Gabriela, and the question caught her off guard. She nodded.

"Want to see?"

"Yeah, what do I look like, but not if it's painful."

"It's not that bad."

"I don't care." Leslie smiled, she couldn't help it. "I promised your friend I wouldn't let you get hurt."

"Aw, I could kiss you." Allison took a large step away, but she couldn't help but smile either when Leslie tugged her back by her belt loop and hooked their arms together. "Feel like watching Casey make a fool out of himself tonight?"

"The answer to that will always be yes."


	3. Chapter 3

**a/n: One chapter left, should be finished before the weekend is over ^_^**

* * *

A month later and Gabriela was still overlapping her hands so that her engagement ring was showing and seemed to be working her way through her squad if only to have new people to tell the story of Matthew's proposal. He'd converted her favorite park (the one squirreled away behind buildings that her and Leslie had found after getting lost one day) into something out of a fairy-tale and gone on bent knee where the trees cropped a perfect square of star filled sky. When she said yes he waved his hand for the others to emerge from behind a canopy whose black drapes had hidden them from sight. Violins were played, toasts were made and Leslie couldn't blame her queasiness on the alcohol Allison had smartly distracted her from.

In practice things weren't different between her and Allison, but they didn't feel the same either. They'd progressed to sharing a drink at Molly's on a regular basis, but with the guys around off the clock and always being interrupted while on the clock there hadn't been an opportunity to talk about what happened; Leslie would've been okay if that didn't change.

"Cute right?"

"I don't know." Leslie squinted at the compact mirror. "Her neck tattoo is really this big?"

"She's sweet! That's a Hawaiian symbol for luck, she told me all about it while I showed her around and she's a receptionist so if you two don't hit it off it's not like I have to deal with her constantly. Severide told me you've been working crazy hours and you can't look at that face and tell me you're not interested."

Someone drummed the top of the car hood and they both jumped until spotting Allison's name badge. Theirs and a couple other firehouses had teamed up to hold CPR certification classes and they'd shown up early, but weren't anymore thanks to Gabriela's noisiness and Kelly's inability to butt out of anyone's personal life ever. She had a feeling he was the one who had sent Allison to drag them in, but that could have had something to do with wanting to blame someone for the conversation happening as they walked towards the rec building.

"What were you two doing?"

"Oh, I was showing Shay the new girl at my job."

"She's in there now."

"Yeah, but why risk her knowing we're talking about her?"

Allison pinched the fabric of Leslie's shirtsleeve, subtly drawing her attention. "You alright?"

" I told you I'm used to it."

"See, she's used to it." Gabriela hooked her arm through Leslie's and picked up their previous conversation where they left off. Leslie whined and kidded in the right places, hardly noticing when Allison's hand left her shirt to hang stiffly at her side as she lead them through the double doors.

Leslie had a mirror on the back of her closet door so that when it was closed she could see herself while lying on her bed. Growing up she'd learned that if she was hurt too badly or exerted herself too much she'd morph, canceling out the worse pain with the lesser one, it was how she'd learned to make minor wounds disappear and it was what had drawn her to a profession that involved equal parts danger and healing. Some people remembered embarrassing things they'd done or nonsense phrases, but when Leslie couldn't sleep she remembered breaking her arm and hearing a little boy scream because she'd grown horns out of the side of a head whose skin had become red-orange while Leslie cried even harder because she'd never morphed before and didn't know why he was leaving her.

So, yeah, she had a few trust issues with the issue being that she trusted anyone who didn't take one look at her and run off in the opposite direction.

Gabriela invited herself, Dana the receptionist and Bryce the driver over to Leslie's to 'hang out' and commence operation dream wedding so Leslie invited Allison, Otis, and Peter over to ensure that the wedding wasn't the only topic up for discussion. Peter turned out to be a complete traitor to Leslie's cause and showed up with a recipe book and his mother, but otherwise things went along predictably. When only Allison, Dana and a recently off work Kelly were left in the living room Leslie nodded for Gabriela to follow her into her bedroom.

"Here's her card, she's a campaign organizer now, but she owes me a favor."

"Wow, this is great." Gabriela pocketed it and dropped onto Leslie's bed like she'd done a million times before. "It's months away, but there's so much to do."

Leslie sat on the carpet and stared up at the legs dangling off her bed. "Most people wait a year."

"We put our lives on the line every day, it's different." She nudged Leslie with her toe. "Be Matt and tell me we're not rushing things. I don't want to freak him out, I just want to hear him say it."

Leslie's eyes flashed gray and her ears shortened. She blinked hard and her face reverted back. "It's getting late."

"Come on, call it an early wedding present?"

The bed shifted as Gabriela turned over, her cheek next to Leslie's. Leslie caught her eye in the mirror and began to morph.

"We're getting married because we're perfect together."

"Not because we keep almost dying?"

"No, I loved you before you the brain injuries and the lawsuits, Gabby, if anything we've been taking our time."

At the door Allison cleared her throat and told Leslie she'd have Kelly take her home instead.

After their last day of CPR training Allison told Leslie that only an idiot wouldn't realize that manipulating one's own anatomy would at the very least cause strain if not outright agony, but even if Gabriela knew that she was still an idiot for not realizing that Leslie only morphed to make her happy.

"You don't know anything about us."

"I know that she's letting you hurt yourself to make her feel better."

"I choose to morph for her and I choose to not make her feel guilty about it."

Allison crossed her arms. "She knows it hurt you. One of the photos I showed her when you were trying not to fold, or whatever you call it, you looked like you were in agony." They were standing in the middle of the parking lot, recently certified children and adults milling past them with the odd firefighter or EMT. "She loves you, Shay, I'm not saying she doesn't, but it don't sit right how she deals with your morphing."

Leslie stepped in close, remembering the photo Allison tucked into the dashboard when she drove and summoning coarse hairs around her mouth while shortening her eyelashes and broadening her shoulders.

"So if you knew someone who could be anyone, you wouldn't take advantage of it? You'd never be tempted?"

Allison slapped her husband's face off of Leslie's then jogged towards the truck instead of the ambulance, stepping on board to the confusion of her coworkers.


	4. Chapter 4

**a/n: Done, thanks in advance for favs/reviews :)**

* * *

They were called out to the carnival less than an hour after it opened because an older woman had collapsed while munching on cotton candy and watching her grand-kids stand in line for the bumper cars. While Leslie checked her vitals Allison frowned at the off color snack and cautiously lifted it to her nose. As she opened her mouth to ask Leslie something shots rang out and a woman screamed from the Ferris wheel as blood trickled down the forehead of the person next to her in the swaying metal bucket currently being riddled with bullets.

The shooter had been falsely accused of abusing the animals in the petting zoo he ran and with no solid proof had been fired after seven loyal years. In the face of being accused of violence against the animals he loved he resorted to mass violence against the humans who he was suddenly less fond of. At the first shot someone reflexively squeezed the trigger of their BB gun which had been altered to quickly turn the non-lethal lethal, a blur of gold rocketing into their wide eyes.

"Nobody touch anything! Back away from all the attractions!"

Heck rigged various death traps before turning in his credentials and took advantage of the chaos to side step his creations on his way to another crow's nest.

Leslie set off to the truck with the woman to radio in the details while Allison went in the opposite direction to rally the security and attempt to coerce the crowd into anything resembling a safe evacuation. Her voice sounded too quiet in the waves of panic, but she kept shouting and running, turning herself into a moving target that Heck took no interest in. He continued picking off attendants and bringing rides to a standstill with kids and adults still aboard. Outside the grounds Leslie was listening in what brought about his meltdown and caught a glimpse of the coordinator.

"We're going to have you with our negotiator and do our best to convince him that he was fired for other reasons, we need you to tell us everything no matter how insignificant."

Leslie had kept her morphing a secret because she used to have nightmares about being hooked up to machines that would drain her of everything that made her Leslie Shay and the fact that if she hadn't been traumatized into seeing the harm it could cause other people she might've turned out a lot worse; a broken arm and she was an EMT instead of terrorist was the way she saw it, but the same things that made her hide her abilities was what made her sneak back into the carnival to get Allison out of there safely.

She had this big idea of morphing into the coordinator and pleading her case with Heck face to face or becoming the woman who had pleaded with the officers to have mercy on him, maybe there was something romantic there she could exploit. She had half plans and courageous ideas that instantly left her head the moment she heard Allison shout, "DON'T!"

They were at the animal pen and Heck had been in the process of handing over his weapon until he spotted Leslie, at which point he raised it so the sights were focused directly in the middle of the face that had fired him.

"This is my partner, she's going to radio in that without a job you couldn't afford your medication and you did all this in a psychotic episode that you are still in. They're going to arrest you, but they won't hurt you if you don't fight back. Tell them everything you told me. Heck?" He scratched one of the ponies behind the ear as it came over to lick the sweat off the side of his head, eyes on Leslie who was wincing at the angry bark of the hostage negotiator. "Drop the gun and sit on your hands."

He threw it onto a stack of hay and as he sat they walked backwards away from him. Leslie morphed back just as a security guard pulled ahead of one of the officers and, before Heck could say a word, slammed a bright pink metal bat into his face. Allison made a noise and started forward, but Leslie turned her around, away from the sight.

"I told you to stay with the truck. Wouldn't be a good day if you didn't almost get yourself killed, huh?"

"You're one to talk. I didn't know they taught hostage negotiation in med school."

"I didn't know being a genetic anomaly made you a superhero."

"Don't you read comic books?"

It was a lousy time to be joking, but it was sort of what they did; emotional foreplay leading up to the stern words and soul bearing. The chief managed to bypass all that by informing Allison she reacted as best she could upon bumping into the perpetrator while on her way back, but Leslie had explicitly gone against procedure and was suspended until further notice. As he expounded on Allison's good work all she could think of was that in that moment they'd both had the same idea. Allison had left a hospital filled with people waiting to die so she could run into a world filled with people who still had a chance.

Allison wasn't the person who ran for help, she was help so she didn't wait for Leslie to find her, but went into Molly's and kissed her before she could say hello.

"I missed you today."

Leslie felt out of breath, her mind empty of a comeback. "I missed you too."

"All that flirting you do, is it all talk?" Leslie shook her head. "Then me and you need to go on a date while you're suspended. Burgers, beers, a movie, no morphing, no dying."

"Yeah, yes that-we could do that."

"And that parking lot stunt means I pick the movie, I pick the burgers, you show up and don't say Gabriela's name once."

"I wouldn't." She shook her head again. "You saved my life, Ra-Allison, I'll take you anywhere you want to go. We can work out the other stuff later."

Allison kissed her again. "You doing anything now?"

Leslie grabbed her coat.


End file.
